• Emily

rejoice, rebuild, the storm has passed

Updated: Jan 28

I haven't been updating because frankly not much has changed. I'm still feeling good, exercising, eating, enjoying the days. But I did have my quarterly skin check with my dermatologist, and that went very well!

My dermatologist immediately noticed the skin changes I've had since she last saw me. For those who don't know, adrenal insufficiency, especially primary adrenal insufficiency can cause hyperpigmentation and discoloration of the skin. Around the time of my diagnosis, I started to notice some subtle but significant brown blotches on my cheeks. I also found many bright, less pigmented spots on my hips and a few more subtle lighter skin spots on my hands. In time I also noticed my arms had some more of the subtle dark spots.

I should mention, of course, that nobody really notices this but me. I mean it when I say subtle. If I point to it, someone would notice it. But otherwise, I don't think anyone would see it first. My hips are the most impacted, but I don't go showing my hips that often!

My dermatologist prescribed me a lightening cream that I could use to fix the darker spots on my face (but made it abundantly clear that this product is to be used sparingly and only on the dark spots, it will literally bleach my skin) but she also told me that we can't do anything about the lighter spots on my hands or hips. She said that the only way to keep them subtle is by keeping my skin out of the sun, pretty much forever. She clarified that the lighter spots will never tan. So when summer comes my regular skin will get darker, and my lighter spots will stay the same.

At this point, I gently reminded her that I planned on that anyway because of the skin cancer. She was like "oh right, of course, yes". I really like my dermatologist because she is brilliant and even took the time to ask me about Isaac and how I'm doing with treatment and everything. I will go back and see her in three months and at that point, we will compare my face then to the pictures they took today to see if the brown spots on my cheeks went away well.

To be honest, I'm not really worried about the changes in my skin color. Yes, it could become obvious in the summer, and yes, it sort of looks like I'm a lizard person. But honestly? I think I look rad as hell. I feel like a fierce jungle cat. I am a cheetah, thank you very much.

But I do understand the importance of keeping my skin out of the sun. We stopped by the drug store on the way home (to fight to get my next bottle of hydrocortisone, OH MY LORD was that a struggle, but I'll save that for another day) and picked up a couple of super-high SPF face lotions. When summer comes I plan to bulk up my wardrobe with a few lightweight UV-protective pieces of clothing (accepting recommendations if ya got 'em!)

Anyway, hope you're all well! Here's one of my favorite songs that I've been feeling lately. Honestly? I've had it relatively easy:

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